Books by Jeff O'Brien

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Hi! I'm Jeff O'Brien, a mediocre white man who writes comedy books. I know what you're saying right now. "Mediocre? Don't flatter yourself!" I set myself up for that joke. That opens the door for more jokes. That's how you do comedy, kids. I've been self-publishing since 2013 because I have no interest in traditional publishers and the feeling is surely mutual. Conspiracy-Comedy just isn't flying off the shelves these days. I just ate two cider donuts and my keyboard is getting sticky. My influences include: John Keel, Tom Green, Terry Pratchett, Peter Gallagher, Monty Python, and the worst b-movies imaginable.

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Journey to the Edge of the Flat Earth
by Jeff O'Brien
Every reality is real. Somewhere. Jeff O'Brien has been to at least two of them. I think the title tells you all you really need to know. Get woke.
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Butt Stuff 2.0
by Jeff O'Brien
Track listing: 1. Introduction by Jon Konrath 2. December 9th 1981 3. Gothsong 4. Nympath 5. Aliens and Butt Stuff 6. Dying at the Dead Mall 7. The Day I Stop Dreaming About Some Random Porn Star From the 90s Named Sunny 8. Dawn of the VHS Twilight 9. A Short Essay About Morrissey 10. Journey to the Edge of the Flat Earth (demo version)...
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Categories: All Sex & Erotica
The Splatter House Rules
by Jeff O'Brien
In Jeff O'Brien's The Splatter House Rules, he takes us to rural Oyster River, New Hampshire, where seventeen year old Tabitha has reluctantly agreed to the mayor's offer to make her a counselor at Camp Lake Montejo, a camp that mysteriously closed down almost twenty years ago for reasons undisclosed. Many a rumor and urban legend had...
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Categories: All Horror
I am Doyle (The Night Manager Book 2)
by Jeff O'Brien
One week after the alien invasion, New Hampshire is once again completely f*cked. Only now it's coming from all directions - not just from the sky. This time, their main target is Doyle, former butcher and novice monster slayer. Lucky for the Granite State, the foul-mouthed, horny, chain-smoking slob has been preparing for this fight....
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Categories: All Horror
Death Dance in the Woods
by Jeff O'Brien
A stripper in Rhode Island escapes her abusive boyfriend and goes on the run for safety. A failed death metal singer in Massachusetts loses his accounting job and goes on a quest to find purpose. They find each other at a motel in the woods of Hollows Point, New Hampshire… Someone in the woods of Hollows Point is waiting for them....
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Categories: All Horror
John Titor is an Asshole
by Jeff O'Brien
Sarah Bartlett, a sexy 80s horror movie host yearns for eternal stardom, or at least to stay relevant for a few decades. After seeking out world-renowned time traveler John Titor, a hero from the future - struggling author and 80s movie expert Jeff O'Brien - is sent to help her achieve that dream. But, such services do not come without a...
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The Halloween Orgy Massacre (Ultimate Edition)
by Jeff O'Brien
It is Halloween. It is 1988. It is another tale of a chosen one and his destiny. But don't worry. This one has a lot of gratuitous sex. High school outcast Will Pratt is in love with Carla Hoff. He wants nothing more than to accompany her to the costume party. Little does he know that visitors from another planet, both good and bad, have...
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Categories: All Horror
BigBoobenstein: The Complete Saga: OmniBUST Edition
by Jeff O'Brien
It started with a breast augmentation that went horribly awry. It led to resurrection and revenge, which was soon followed by a fight against the world for Undead equality. Then there was a fight with some Martians. Then marriage, children, stripping, trolls, talking hernias, big dildos, and many other things including love and...
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Categories: All Horror
My Head is Full of Haunted Houses: And Other Stories
by Jeff O'Brien
One novelette and six short stories pulled from a skull haunted by the following: goth chicks, malls, foreign b-movies, turn-of-the-century emo bands, and conspiracy theories.1. THE LOVE STORY2. MY HEAD IS FULL OF HAUNTED HOUSES3. GOTH SONG4. GHOST DAD (NOT STARRING BILL COSBY)5. STAIRS6. WELCOME, INTERLOPER7. I COULDN'T TELL IF SHE WAS...
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The Splatter House Rules
by Jeff O'Brien
In Jeff O'Brien's The Splatter House Rules, he takes us to rural Oyster River, New Hampshire, where seventeen year old Tabitha has reluctantly agreed to the mayor's offer to make her a counselor at Camp Lake Montejo, a camp that mysteriously closed down almost twenty years ago for reasons undisclosed. Many a rumor and urban legend had...
Today's Bargain Price: $0.99
Or FREE with
Categories: All Horror
The Splatter House Rules
by Jeff O'Brien
In Jeff O'Brien's The Splatter House Rules, he takes us to rural Oyster River, New Hampshire, where seventeen year old Tabitha has reluctantly agreed to the mayor's offer to make her a counselor at Camp Lake Montejo, a camp that mysteriously closed down almost twenty years ago for reasons undisclosed. Many a rumor and urban legend had...
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Or FREE with
Categories: All Horror
The Sorceress Queen: Byron the Barbarian: Book 1
by Jeff O'Brien
A tale of a foul-mouthed barbarian and a sultry swordswoman. Byron was a simple wandering axe-man in search of nothing more than taverns for ale drinking and buxom maidens to take to bed. In his journey for such treasures he stumbles upon a female of a mythical race, and soon after, an aging wizard. Both of which would need his axe and...
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Categories: All Fantasy; All Horror
The Sorceress Queen: Byron the Barbarian: Book 1
by Jeff O'Brien
A tale of a foul-mouthed barbarian and a sultry swordswoman. Byron was a simple wandering axe-man in search of nothing more than taverns for ale drinking and buxom maidens to take to bed. In his journey for such treasures he stumbles upon a female of a mythical race, and soon after, an aging wizard. Both of which would need his axe and...
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Categories: All Fantasy; All Horror
The Night Manager
by Jeff O'Brien
Doyle has quite a day of obstacles ahead of him at the grocery store - particularly terror from the sky and a world overrun by cannibalistic monstrosities. But he's ready for it. He's just been promoted to NIGHT MANAGER.
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The Sorceress Queen: Byron the Barbarian: Book 1
by Jeff O'Brien
A tale of a foul-mouthed barbarian and a sultry swordswoman. Byron was a simple wandering axe-man in search of nothing more than taverns for ale drinking and buxom maidens to take to bed. In his journey for such treasures he stumbles upon a female of a mythical race, and soon after, an aging wizard. Both of which would need his axe and...
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Or FREE with
Categories: All Fantasy; All Horror
The Night Manager
by Jeff O'Brien
Doyle has quite a day of obstacles ahead of him at the grocery store - particularly terror from the sky and a world overrun by cannibalistic monstrosities. But he's ready for it. He's just been promoted to NIGHT MANAGER.
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Categories: All Horror
The Night Manager
by Jeff O'Brien
Doyle has quite a day of obstacles ahead of him at the grocery store - particularly terror from the sky and a world overrun by cannibalistic monstrosities. But he's ready for it. He's just been promoted to NIGHT MANAGER.
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Categories: All Horror
Frankenfairy
by Jeff O'Brien
Kevin was the star center of his high school’s varsity basketball team, so nobody really cared that he was assembled from the spare, stitched together body parts of several different babies who died at birth and then reanimated into a living being. In fact, he was the most popular kid at school. His scars and stitches were virtually...
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Frankenfairy
by Jeff O'Brien
Kevin was the star center of his high school’s varsity basketball team, so nobody really cared that he was assembled from the spare, stitched together body parts of several different babies who died at birth and then reanimated into a living being. In fact, he was the most popular kid at school. His scars and stitches were virtually...
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Demons of Bathoria: Byron the Barbarian: Book Three
by Jeff O'Brien
Mardra is still far from the arms of Byron, but the barbarian has gained a loyal friend and traveling partner in Oberyl O'Garyn, a fierce dwarven warrior from the mountains of the Eerie. Oberyl is accompanying Byron back to Rosecrown, where the barbarian foolishly left the woman of his dreams behind. What he will find there will not be...
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Categories: Action and Adventure; All Fantasy
Frankenfairy
by Jeff O'Brien
Kevin was the star center of his high school’s varsity basketball team, so nobody really cared that he was assembled from the spare, stitched together body parts of several different babies who died at birth and then reanimated into a living being. In fact, he was the most popular kid at school. His scars and stitches were virtually...
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Or FREE with
Categories: Unknown
Demons of Bathoria: Byron the Barbarian: Book Three
by Jeff O'Brien
Mardra is still far from the arms of Byron, but the barbarian has gained a loyal friend and traveling partner in Oberyl O'Garyn, a fierce dwarven warrior from the mountains of the Eerie. Oberyl is accompanying Byron back to Rosecrown, where the barbarian foolishly left the woman of his dreams behind. What he will find there will not be...
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Categories: Action and Adventure; All Fantasy
A BigBoobenstein Family Christmas
by Jeff O'Brien
Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, a family of undeads were reveling in the holiday spirit, getting wasted, stripping, and watching porn. But when they heard footsteps on the roof, it wasn't Santa.
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Demons of Bathoria: Byron the Barbarian: Book Three
by Jeff O'Brien
Mardra is still far from the arms of Byron, but the barbarian has gained a loyal friend and traveling partner in Oberyl O'Garyn, a fierce dwarven warrior from the mountains of the Eerie. Oberyl is accompanying Byron back to Rosecrown, where the barbarian foolishly left the woman of his dreams behind. What he will find there will not be...
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Or FREE with
Categories: Action and Adventure; All Fantasy
A BigBoobenstein Family Christmas
by Jeff O'Brien
Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, a family of undeads were reveling in the holiday spirit, getting wasted, stripping, and watching porn. But when they heard footsteps on the roof, it wasn't Santa.
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The Horror of Castle Valgorn: Byron the Barbarian: Book Two
by Jeff O'Brien
Byron left Rosecrown the most wanted man on the continent. An offer of royalty and love could have protected him, but in true barbarian fashion he refused. Upon a ship bound for Leedonia he meets a young harlot and finds a mysterious hooded woman spying on him from the shadows. Not long after setting foot back on land he is again...
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Categories: All Fantasy
A BigBoobenstein Family Christmas
by Jeff O'Brien
Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, a family of undeads were reveling in the holiday spirit, getting wasted, stripping, and watching porn. But when they heard footsteps on the roof, it wasn't Santa.
Today's Bargain Price: $0.99
Or FREE with
Categories: Unknown
The Horror of Castle Valgorn: Byron the Barbarian: Book Two
by Jeff O'Brien
Byron left Rosecrown the most wanted man on the continent. An offer of royalty and love could have protected him, but in true barbarian fashion he refused. Upon a ship bound for Leedonia he meets a young harlot and finds a mysterious hooded woman spying on him from the shadows. Not long after setting foot back on land he is again...
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Categories: All Fantasy
Very True Stories Starring Jeff O'Brien
by Jeff O'Brien
"Jeff O'Brien is a funny, funny dude."- Danger Slater, author of Puppet Skin "A massively talented horror-comedy writer."- Terry M. West, Pleasant Storm Entertainment Jeff O'Brien is the author of such almost successful works as the BigBoobenstein series and The Halloween Orgy Massacre. But, in this effort, he reveals to you the man...
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Categories: All Horror
The Horror of Castle Valgorn: Byron the Barbarian: Book Two
by Jeff O'Brien
Byron left Rosecrown the most wanted man on the continent. An offer of royalty and love could have protected him, but in true barbarian fashion he refused. Upon a ship bound for Leedonia he meets a young harlot and finds a mysterious hooded woman spying on him from the shadows. Not long after setting foot back on land he is again...
Today's Bargain Price: $0.99
Or FREE with
Categories: All Fantasy
Very True Stories Starring Jeff O'Brien
by Jeff O'Brien
"Jeff O'Brien is a funny, funny dude."- Danger Slater, author of Puppet Skin "A massively talented horror-comedy writer."- Terry M. West, Pleasant Storm Entertainment Jeff O'Brien is the author of such almost successful works as the BigBoobenstein series and The Halloween Orgy Massacre. But, in this effort, he reveals to you the man...
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Categories: All Horror
Heart-Shaved Box
by Jeff O'Brien
Ellie and Frank are high school sweeties. Ellie is a good Catholic girl, and Frank is a typical horny seventeen-year-old male who is getting bored with his girlfriend's sworn oath of abstinence. After a year of monogamous blue balls and no hope in sight, Frank makes a few requests of Ellie which she flat-out rejects at first. But after...
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Categories: All Sex & Erotica
Very True Stories Starring Jeff O'Brien
by Jeff O'Brien
"Jeff O'Brien is a funny, funny dude."- Danger Slater, author of Puppet Skin "A massively talented horror-comedy writer."- Terry M. West, Pleasant Storm Entertainment Jeff O'Brien is the author of such almost successful works as the BigBoobenstein series and The Halloween Orgy Massacre. But, in this effort, he reveals to you the man...
Today's Bargain Price: $3.99
Or FREE with
Categories: All Horror
Heart-Shaved Box
by Jeff O'Brien
Ellie and Frank are high school sweeties. Ellie is a good Catholic girl, and Frank is a typical horny seventeen-year-old male who is getting bored with his girlfriend's sworn oath of abstinence. After a year of monogamous blue balls and no hope in sight, Frank makes a few requests of Ellie which she flat-out rejects at first. But after...
Today's Bargain Price: $0.99
Or FREE with
Categories: All Sex & Erotica
Heart-Shaved Box
by Jeff O'Brien
Ellie and Frank are high school sweeties. Ellie is a good Catholic girl, and Frank is a typical horny seventeen-year-old male who is getting bored with his girlfriend's sworn oath of abstinence. After a year of monogamous blue balls and no hope in sight, Frank makes a few requests of Ellie which she flat-out rejects at first. But after...
Today's Bargain Price: $0.99
Or FREE with
Categories: All Sex & Erotica
Oberyl the Hammer: Oberyl Book One
by Jeff O'Brien
He loves drinking ale. He loves smoking pipe leaf. He loves bedding whores. But that's just what he does in his time off. The story of Oberyl O'Garyn of the Eerie began long before he crossed paths with a young barbarian by the name of Byron. This is where that story begins - From his humble beginnings in a quiet mountaintop home, to...
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Oberyl the Hammer: Oberyl Book One
by Jeff O'Brien
He loves drinking ale. He loves smoking pipe leaf. He loves bedding whores. But that's just what he does in his time off. The story of Oberyl O'Garyn of the Eerie began long before he crossed paths with a young barbarian by the name of Byron. This is where that story begins - From his humble beginnings in a quiet mountaintop home, to...
Today's Bargain Price: $0.99
Or FREE with
Categories: Unknown
Oberyl the Hammer: Oberyl Book One
by Jeff O'Brien
He loves drinking ale. He loves smoking pipe leaf. He loves bedding whores. But that's just what he does in his time off. The story of Oberyl O'Garyn of the Eerie began long before he crossed paths with a young barbarian by the name of Byron. This is where that story begins - From his humble beginnings in a quiet mountaintop home, to...
Today's Bargain Price: $0.99
Or FREE with
Categories: Unknown
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